brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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