Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
