VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
