Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
