But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Randomize
