I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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