Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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