just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
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