do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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