so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize