He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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