marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Barsexuality is the new black.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
