i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
