"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
so explain again why im purple
no
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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