Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
