Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
