her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
