I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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