He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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