dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
