so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
