Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
