I want to make a zoo with you.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
