Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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