is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
