just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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