***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
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