I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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