Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
