i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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