Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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