Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
