everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
