you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
