Porn is love you can see.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
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