i'm signing you up for texting rehab
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
