I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Randomize
