No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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