Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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