you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
