Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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