Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
