You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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