we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
