he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Randomize
