Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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