I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
We left an ass print on the piano.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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