what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Dick very happy bro
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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