Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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