Having a random hookup so left but love u
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
