Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
